What’s that saying? The more things change, the more they stay the same?

We had a real estate agent come out on Thursday afternoon to look around our house and discuss selling. Good news: The house is pretty much ready to sell as it is. The only advice the agent gave us was to “de-clutter the kitchen a bit”—at which point I had to hide a smile, because Lady, we have a newborn and a 3-year old, and we were up cleaning the house until 2am the night before—this IS de-cluttered. Bad news: The selling market in our area is (STILL) pretty crappy, especially for 3-bedroom houses (which came as a surprise to us—apparently more people look for 4-bedroom houses, even as “starter homes,” these days?). If we tried to sell right now, we would have to list the house for about $5-6K less than the price for which we bought it, and it would probably sell for another $4-5K under that. So we would be looking at a $10K loss right off the bat, with another $10K between various fees and the agent’s commission. Meaning we’d end up over $20K in the hole. And that is a BIG HOLE. Plus, we’d need all that money up front when closing. Uhhh.

The entire point of selling the house was to SAVE money, wasn’t it? And if we HAD over $20K just lying around, we wouldn’t be selling the house in the first place!

So. We’re staying for now. It’s disappointing and frustrating because we really have no choice. Hopefully the market will pick up in our area by next year so we can finally move.

I’m also going back to my old job tomorrow (*headdesk*). I called my supervisor last week; she said she’d check with the boss and call me back, and two minutes later, my phone rang. (What can I say? I’m loved! heh) It’s not ideal—my Mom is driving an hour here and an hour back to babysit two days a week, which I didn’t want her to do—but it’s a paycheck until I can find something else. Hopefully soon.

As for George, some of you may have seen my Tweets a while back about a new job role/opportunity we were hoping he would get. Somehow the idea came about that he could work with his current company’s outside consultant to do some work on the side that is related to health care laws and any potential changes that may affect the company’s clients. He was given a project in December as sort of a “trial run,” and apparently they liked his work and feel they can utilize both his law degree as well as his experience with health care data/programming, because he was just given two more projects! He is REALLY excited about this opportunity. It’s not a “lawyer job,” per se, but in the end (based on what he’s seen while job hunting) this may actually make him MORE marketable than having experience as an attorney alone.

Oh, and also? The consultant George is helping? Works out of BOSTON. They told George relocation was unnecessary, even as this part of his job becomes more involved, but we want to go there anyway… so I told him, “This is a sign!”

*sigh* It’s going to take a bit longer than we expected, but things are in progress. We printed out a picture of Boston to hang on our fridge as motivation, we’re planning a trip out there this year (slightly postponed—instead of May, now waiting until Aug or Sept), and in the meantime we’re doing what we can here. Each day is one day closer to getting where we want to go.

Oliver was a great sleeper for the first three years of his life. He slept through the night from the age of 8 weeks, he napped consistently, he was a well-rested and happy little guy.

And then? He got too big for his crib.

When we initially took the side rail off Oliver’s crib (a few weeks after his third birthday), he stayed in bed the first two nights. We could hardly believe it. Then he discovered that he could get out of bed. Then he discovered that not only could he get out of bed, he could LEAVE HIS ROOM. Bedtime gradually stretched into one, two, three hours of returning him to his room over and over, less and less patiently, with more and more pleading, bribing, yelling, crying. And Oliver does not sleep in, no matter how late he stays up. Oh no. These late night battles were followed by early morning wake-ups. He was coming into our room at 6:30am… 6:00am… 5:SOMETHINGTOODAMNEARLY. Meanwhile, we were also getting up at least once per night with a newborn! If it wasn’t Andrew waking up Oliver, it was Oliver waking up Andrew. It was exhausting day after exhausting day, followed by exhausting bedtime after exhausting bedtime. I was running on coffee and adrenaline. I felt horrible, and worse, I felt like a horrible mother.

A few weeks ago, beginning on Christmas, Oliver decided he didn’t need an afternoon nap anymore, either. That’s when I decided something had to be done before we all went crazy. He wasn’t sleeping enough at night, he wasn’t taking naps, and he was CRANKY, disobedient, and wild (being stuck indoors during freezing, snowy weather didn’t help). I was tired of the fights, tired of the bad moods (especially mine), just tired of all of us being tired.

So I used an idea from this awesome book (which is why both my boys slept/sleep so well as babies!) and bought him a clock. A simple, small, digital clock with big red numbers. He was REALLY excited about it.

“This will help you know when it’s time to get up in the morning,” I explained. “If you see a ’7′ on the left side, like this”—I drew him a picture of a digital ’7′ and placed it right in front of the clock—”you can come into our room. But if it’s not a ’7′ yet, that means it’s too early, and you should try to go back to sleep until you see a ’7.’”

“OKAY!” he exclaimed happily. “I LOVE my new clock!”

And you know what? IT WORKED. He still woke up earlier than 7:00 the next morning (we only knew this because I was up with the baby), but he waited in his room until 7:00 before coming to get us. “There’s a ’7′ on the left side!” he proclaimed, “come and see!” and he dragged us into his room to show us. We made a big deal out of it and praised him, and gave him a special treat (a piece of sweet cinnamon bread) with his cereal at breakfast. The second morning, he actually slept until after 7:00—and since then he usually still does!

So I did the same thing for his nap time, drawing a picture of a digital ’2,’ so he knew to stay in bed—or at least in his room—until 2:00. (He goes up to his room around 12:30.) “Even if you don’t fall asleep,” I told him, “you still need to rest quietly in your bed for a while.”

And IT WORKED AGAIN. After 3 weeks of no naps and really no break in action at all, he stayed in his room, and after the first couple days he starting NAPPING again. Hallelujah! I’m so glad I didn’t let him just give up his naps yet, because he obviously still needs them. I know he won’t always need or be able to nap much longer, especially after he starts preschool in the fall, but for now it’s still REALLY helping.

I also had Oliver help me write out four Sleep Rules from that same book. We went over all the rules together, and he was very proud that he could read/spell some of the words (Oliver, sleep, bed, go).

He now keeps this sign with him in bed. If he follows his Sleep Rules and waits for the right number on the clock, he gets a star on the special calendar we made, which hangs on the refrigerator. There are two spots for a star each day, one for nap time and one for bed time; each star is good for some type of privilege, such as a treat (like a small piece of dark chocolate) or a favorite activity (we don’t let him watch much tv, maybe one or two episodes of “Word World” per day at most, so his reward could be watching “Cars” or some other movie on the weekend). We go over his Rules and the Time To Get Up every time we bring him to bed, and we always thank him enthusiastically when he stays in his room and sleeps. He likes having a routine again, and he REALLY likes getting praised and rewarded!

This strategy is not 100% fool proof, of course. For example, last night he came to get us twice, claiming that he had to poop on the potty (something we’re still working on), when apparently he didn’t have to go. We don’t want to discourage him from trying to poop on the potty, but we don’t want him to think it’s a game either, so after the second time we encouraged him to try to sleep and wait until morning to use the potty (which he did). We know we need to be flexible with the whole nighttime-potty-training thing for a while yet.

But the clock and the sleep rules are otherwise working beautifully, and he is SLEEPING more (or at least not waking us up at the crack of dawn) and we are ALL in better moods. It’s amazing what a $10 clock and a piece of paper can do.

Now if only I could teach ANDREW to use the clock…

Tonight there are just four of us for the first time since Andrew was 5 days old: George’s mom is on her way back to Hungary. It was great to have her here, but two months is a long time for ANY visitor, and I must say it’s a bit of a relief to have the house back to ourselves.

Many people have called me a saint for hosting my mother-in-law for this long, and right after having a baby. I’m not a saint. I’m just tolerant, I guess. She IS the woman who let her son go 4600 miles away to America, and he is now my (amazing) husband and the father of my children. It’s only fair that she gets to descend upon us for an extended stay now and then to offer lots of unsolicited advice, share my hair dryer (I rarely use it anyway these days), and help us exceed our daily caloric requirements every day… right?

In the spirit of sharing, here are some tips for surviving 9.75 weeks with your mother-in-law!

Things will go more smoothly if:

1. She keeps busy. Oliver did not warm up to her very much (not entirely her fault—he’s not good with strangers, although I DO think she gave up on him too quickly), and I was doing 99% of caring for Andrew (he’s my last baby, and I wanted to, you know?). So instead of playing with the kids, she… painted. A LOT. One mention of the Eternal Bathroom Project (*cough* slacker husband *cough cough*) and she took over. Here are a couple before-and-afters:

The flooring still needs replaced, but we’ll worry about that later. It’s already MUCH better. No more Scary Bird Nest Border, woo!

She also repainted our entire living room/dining room, which used to be blue (as seen in the background of our 2007 Christmas photo). It is now a neutral “pearl” shade in preparation for selling the house. (Ignore all the books on the table in the back of the top photo–we’re reorganizing our bookshelves!)

To top it off, she painted the hallway and ALL the doors/trims AND all the ceilings in the house, so that was a HUGE help and we’re very grateful for her hard work!

2. She speaks another language. It’s easier to ignore those passive-aggressive comments when you don’t understand what she’s saying! heh. For example, most people who see this on our piano say, “What a cute picture!”

But my mother-in-law, to George: “I don’t understand why she likes black picture frames so much.” (I happen to have a collection of black and white photos in black frames in the living room, as seen in this living room photo from tip #1. But the rest of the frames in the house are other colors, so…?) That’s just a fairly benign example. She criticized me for a million things; thankfully, I was oblivious to it most of the time. BUT—she told George I was a good mother. And in the end, that’s all that counts, to me.

3. She snores loudly. No, seriously. I wouldn’t joke about this except that she jokes about it herself. Between her snoring and the fan we run on a low setting in the hallway (so Andrew’s night wakings don’t wake up Oliver), we didn’t have to worry about the baby waking her up. Also, George and I weren’t exactly, umm, chaste or anything, so it helped that, too… lol.

I won’t say I’ll miss being witnessed in all my unshowered, bleary-eyed glory every morning, but in the end I can’t begrudge her a single day because she missed most of Oliver’s growing up for the past 3 years and we don’t know when we’ll get to see her again. I know she loved being with her son and grandkids, although she probably wishes we either a) had another summer baby, or b) lived somewhere warmer! Being stuck indoors most of the time was hard on all of us but I hope she at least enjoyed spending the holidays here.

Now that she’s gone, I’ll have to cook for the first time since October. Thankfully she left me a bunch of her recipes! YUM.

First thing’s first, though. Time for a big glass of wine. Here’s to a return of “normal” family life!

It’s time to tackle this again.

My weight was something I tried to avoid discussing too much since I got pregnant last February. Lord knows that’s ALL I worried and whined about during my pregnancy with Oliver, when I gained 51 lb despite a healthy diet and plenty of exercise. But this time, I was too concerned with just staying pregnant to care about the number on the scale. Thankfully, my doctor was very understanding in regards to my particular situation (normally, I avoid white carbs, but I can’t do that during pregnancy because the baby needs those nutrients) and told me not to worry about it. I ate a balanced diet, treated myself now and then (perhaps more than I should have towards the end, STUPID HALLOWEEN CANDY), and got plenty of exercise thanks to having a very active 3 year old. Even so, by the time I gave birth to Andrew, I had gained 58 lb.

When Andrew was 3.5 weeks old (by which time I had stopped breastfeeding), I resumed my old diet and started working out 4-5 days a week. It felt good to work on getting back to “me” again.

It’s now been 2 months since Andrew was born. I’ve lost 33 lb so far, which leaves me 25 lb away from my pre-pregnancy weight. Here are the stats:

Pre-pregnancy weight: 150 lb (5 lb more than I wanted to be, but I’d take it now in a heartbeat!)
Top pregnancy weight: 208 lb (which sucked really bad, but was SO WORTH IT for Andrew’s sake)
1 week after Andrew’s birth: 188 lb
1 month: 181 lb
2 months: 175 lb (honestly, I *feel* about 10 lb less than that)

I’m impatient, I’ll admit, but I’m also trying to be realistic. Last time I think I expected the weight to just magically disappear in the first couple months—which, of course, it didn’t. This time I know better. I’ve been working really hard from the get-go, but I also realize it’s going to take another 7-10 months before I’m completely back in shape. I’ve already lost 2 inches from my waist in the past 5 weeks, so I know my body is sloooooowly changing, even though it will be a while before I can squeeze into my old size 8 jeans again.

My goal is to lose 20 more pounds and reach a weight of 155 lb by May 3, when Andrew turns 6 months old. I hope to be back into my old clothes by then, even if I still want to lose another 5-10 lb over the summer.

I’ll update my progress here monthly. Wish me luck!